5 Ways to deal with a Psycho Toddler at Bedtime
Man. I don’t know what your house is like around 6 pm, but I can try to paint you a picture of mine. Have you ever seen “The Shining?” you know, the one where Jack Nicholson axes down the bathroom door with a “here’s Johnnnnnny!” Picture that, except replace the adult-man psychopath with a manic, over-tired drunk on life toddler, bursting open the bathroom door, spilling milk everywhere while trying to tackle me into the shower.
“I tried to school you dowwwn!” he proudly giggles, stomping out of the bathroom as quickly as he had stormed in. My son’s most recent favorite expression, meaning basically he tried to take me down and squash me like a bug. I really don’t know if it’s just a boy thing (I’ve asked my parents and they insist that my sister and I were not like this), but my son is *obsessed* with all things smashing, crashing and bashing. Fighting, hitting, wrestling. The testosterone seems to run high with this one.
My mom recently made the comment that he “puts in a hard day,” which is an excellent way of describing it. From sun up to sun down, he is on the go. However, at or around 5 pm, my son starts inching the gas pedal ever closer to the floor. Around 6, he becomes running nuclear powered. Come 7 pm, he is a full-blown maniac, tyrannosaurs toddler. Running, yelling, shouting, tackling and inevitably melting down into a tiny man puddle in the middle of whatever room we happen to be in.
He’s my first, so of course there is a learning curve with all new stages. At first, I thought that maybe he wasn’t getting enough exercise during the day, so he needed to “get it out” before bed each night. I entertained the possibility that he needed more quiet and down time, then less, then more screen time, then less. It took me longer than I’d like to admit to figure out that when he was getting tired, his little engine was working harder to keep him running. When I hear his jet engines starting up, I can tell that bedtime needs to happen ASAP (or we are already too late),
So without further ado, I’d like to propose a list of things that I have found to be (somewhat) successful in keeping the manic monster at bay.
1.) Get them to bed early and at around the same time each night.
I know this seems obvious, but I can’t tell you how many time we played around with our son’s bedtime to try to find something more fitting. My husband and I both work from home, so we’ve made the mistake of trying to build a routine that is better for us than it is for our son. Seven-7:30pm is a great goal to shoot for. Toddlers often sleep deepest between 8pm and midnight and tend to wake less throughout the night of they are in bed before 9.
2.) Don’t give up on naps.
Children tend to have a sleep regression around 2. It may seem that your little one is ready to drop his/her nap at this age, but stick it out – it will be worth it. If your child continues to stage a nap protest, make sure that you are still providing them with quiet time. My son stopped napping at 2.5. I still tuck him in and tell him to close his eyes. If he falls asleep great, but if not he will still usually rest in bed for a bit or look at some books. This provides him an opportunity to sit in a quiet place, free of excessive noise and stimulation.
3.) Incorporate a routine that helps them unwind.
In our house, bath time tends to be playtime. It doesn’t exactly wind him down, but it does send him the signal that we are transitioning from daytime to nighttime – a concept that is somewhat difficult for kids to articulate. Our toddler responds really positively to books, so this is a time that he gets to be a “big boy” and stay up later than his little brother. He gets to cuddle up with mom and dad and enjoy some books. We let him pick two and mom and dad each pick one – this is a great way to practice taking turns. It also allows us to cycle in some less-read books or choose one that’s super short on a night when we are really tired. 😉 Sometimes, we might use our Leapfrog Globe or do some trivia cards that he enjoys. I take advantage of adding in short educational lessons at night – when kiddos want to delay bedtime, they may just be willing to listen to just about anything.
4.) Have your child say goodnight to his/her toys
Acknowledging that it’s bedtime for everyone – truckies, bears and dinos has helped our son accept that it’s time to crawl into bed himself. Recently, he has wanted us to give his objects “a voice” and he will often talk to them and wait for us to respond. For example:
Conrad: “Blanket”
Blanket (Mom): “Yes, Conrad?”
Conrad: “It’s time to snuggle up.”
Blanket: “You’re right, get under here little man.”
5.) Try the Calm App
We downloaded this app as we had an Amex offer that included a year’s worth of service for free. It allows you to play calming music and sounds or to listen to a story read aloud in a slow and soothing tone. This hasn’t been the magic wand that he had hoped for, but we are sticking with it as a way to hopefully set the tone and make the atmosphere as conducive to sleep as possible.
So there you have it, I still try to make sure my little dragon is getting plenty of exercise during the day, with moments of quieter activities as well. I in no way am claiming to be an expert as anyone knows that no two kids are alike. Heck, my three year old isn’t the same kid two days in a row either. I also do my best to remind myself that these are the good old days, and someday a short 20 or 30 years away, I’ll think back to that little boy storming into the bathroom and instead of rolling my eyes, I might even smile.
